Volume 5, Issue 5, page 13
the female bark of this barkand-bite family with "Christmas in July" cologne. Hope this
doesn't leak out, but one of
the reasons some persons suspect Ye Ed of being psychic is
because we know when Ye pub is
coming, even if she slips up
on us barefoot. Thanks to the
Walshes... ',Fred Hand of Houston, Texas, finally has completed the necessary requirements for his B.A. in psychology, which, he thinks, puts
him a few semesters ahead of
even Doctors of Scientology.
Now, Fred thinks, he might as
well go on for a couple more
years and get his M.A., and by
that time, he may decide to
make a "hobby of it and try
for PhD, too". Degrees are a
bit like drinking, Fred. If
you can stop after the first
one, there's little danger of
your becoming an alcoholic...
1 For obvious reasons, we
can't mention names, but one
of the funniest mix-ups we've
heard of lately concerned two
self-hypnotizing tapes sent to
the wrong persons. Luckily, the
error was discovered before
the wife with marital problems
and the widow with physical
infirmities began trying to
cure, in their sleep, what was
allegedly wrong with someone
a thousand or so miles away.
Now, some fiction writer might
use this as the basis of a
plot: Suppose a tape made for
a"frigid" woman was sent to a
sex deviate who couldn't control his or her desires -- and
the error never was discovered
consciously by anyone... 1 Our
Postmaster General, who has
been so busy lobbying before a
" G i ve- 'em-All-They-Ask " Congress for higher postal rates
that he has neglected the patrons who buy the stamps, can
be partly blamed for this: The
June issue of this beloved decameral , intended f o r our
British subscribers, finally
reached them rubber - stamped:
"Mis-sent to Honolulu", and now
we understand that the bundle
of foreign mail, which we wrap
separately from those going to
England, ended up in one package in the hands of L Spence,
Ladybank, Fifeshire, Scotland.
And the letter from Wl, James
Clark. of Dal beattie teITTs-iB
of the ^ixup, reached us with
the added insult to injury:
" Mis-sent to Salt Lake City,
Utah" , which looks and sounds
about as much like Enid, Okla
as a Baptist Choir sounds like
grand opera. However, now that
Mr. Summerfield h a s won his
fight for more cash, maybe this
issue will reach each and all
of you exactly where it is addressed. In the meantime, we
SEPTEMBER, 1958
thank Mr. Spence and others
for subbing as U. S. Postal
clerks during this "national
emergency "
1 When Will Jiauth of Dallas /Houston stopped in Enid
on his way to a new sales territory in t he East-Central
States, he tempted us none at
all with his Christmas decorations for cities, a bit with
his "Great Books of the Western World" , but he did find a
sale in his offer of a Chinese
dinner at one of the local
eateries. Anyhow, we now have
a pretty good idea of what's
wrong/ right with all these
way-of-life dealers -- which is
just what we suspected all
along. Before he left, Will
"ran us" for a few moments on
a technique "guaranteed" to
exteriorize one, but we weren't disappointed when it didn't work. Other "guarantees"
that cost us a lot more -- one
as much as $800 -- didn't do it,
either... ', Another visitor - -
W.P.Mullen and family of Tulsa
-- stopped by on their way to a
Colorado vacation, and found
us pretty well paint-smeared
as we stole a few minutes (?)
from the office to give the
house a much-needed going over.
Luckily, there were enough
cherries still clinging to the
trees that we could shoo them
into the c r $rile madle,
ourselves a bit more presentable -- but maybe it was our
paint-smeared hands that made
them decide to stay only long
enough to renew a long-expired
subscription to The ABERREE.
It isn't often we get caught
so green-handed... 1 "Here to
do some auditing" Adele Mazurek, of Chicago, pens on