Volume 2, Issue 5, page 7


Seaman P. John Ruffles
got out of the Navy, a clean
deck had become almost a
habit. In "boot camp", from
the minute the gates closed
behind him, he had been
taught to sweep and swab --
his barracks, the room they
called "the head", and even the weedless,
grassless yard.

So, when Citizen Ruffles looked around him and saw the filthy litter in the
streets, the unswept porches and rooms
with inch-thick rugs covering up another
half-inch layer of dust, he was sorely
troubled.
"Something must be done!" he said,
and since Ruffles had an economic need
also, he decided to combine the two problems.
.how to go out and teach others how to not
understand all there was to know about
swabbing and sweeping and dust and dirt
and filth.

The ex-gob thrived. Hundreds enroled
in his school; thousands more bought his
book, and millions who had thought nothing of dirt and dust and filth were suddenly awakened to. the urgent need for
swabbing and sweeping.

But Mr. Ruggles .was .not satisfied.
During his research, he discovered that
if the bristles of the broom were made a
bit finer, more area could be covered
with fewer strokes, and over. the objections of his financial supporters, he announced his course in the use of the
super-broom. There was a rift -- and Ruffles, hurt and indignant at the narrow,
commercial viewpoints of the money-lenders, moved his school to another city.

The super-broom school was a success
-- maybe not the success the plain broom
school had been, but there were new backers, new students, and new research. And
out of this research came the super-duper
broom. With this broom, all the older
models were made obsolete. The plain
broom took an hour to sweep a room; the
super-broom would do it in half that time
-- but .the super-duper-broom -- well, the
floor could be both swabbed and swept in
fifteen minutes!
Many who hadlearned to use the plain
But how? "Whi.te Wings" had gone out
of style with the passing of the horse;
to get a job as janitor, you had to be
old and crabby. So Ruffles wrote a book.
It was a good book, telling all about
dirt, and dust, and filth -- and how its
accumulation on the floor got into the
lungs and from the lungs into the blood
and from the blood into the cells themselves, eventually carrying out the ancient poetic premise of "Dust to dust".

Thousands bought the book. And within weeks, most '